Christianity Lived

Ok, so as weird as this seems, I’m happily depressed.  I’m happy, because I’ve finally graduated, I’m starting college in a couple of months, I got a new laptop, I just met A TON of my future classmates on Facebook, and church camp (Zenith) is less than a week away.  But, I’m also depressed…

Too much drama, college is so close, my knee hurts, and I don’t have anyone commenting on hardly anything on this blog.  Alan said it was kinda depressing at first…yes, dear, you were right lol.  Anywho…

Yeah…

Ok, so I have a little problem, and I’m looking for a solution.

Here’s an hypothetical situation.  There is a question at the end that would help me with my solution-finding.

You’re 36 years old.  You have a 22 year old daughter, who’s married with a 3 year old son.  You have a 21 year old stepdaughter, who’s about to be married.  You have a 20 year old son whom you’ve never met.  You have an 18 year old daughter who’s about to graduate.  You have a 16 year old son who’s trying to get there.  You have a husband of 16 years.  You have a living mother, as well as two brothers.  And then you die.

What do you miss?  What could you have done if you hadn’t died?  What things would you have experienced if you had lived?

For example:  Your daughter walking the stage at graduation.

Can you tell that I really enjoy this artist?  :)  Here’s another one of his almost shockingly candid songs.  This one is based on three actual letters that he received from fans.  These are real stories, and they really happen all the time in the teen world, even if you don’t see it.  I think that some people in the older generation (by older generation, I mean people who are older than us) don’t understand what really goes on in the life of a teen, because a lot of things that the average teen goes through today is not even close to what it was even just 10-15 years ago.  Teens today face more pressure and a lot more violence and pain than they did a decade ago.  So, this song sort of chronicles that.

My arms are sliced up but I’m not embarrassed
It’s the only way I get attention now from my parents
It’s not like they really take the time to be caring
They just use me to watch the baby when they run they errands
My name is ___ I got a friend named Karen
She gave me your CD with the track for Eminem
You wrote a song called #1 fan I listened and
I wanted to know if you can help me like you was helping them
She had something even harder to be mentioning
Like every single day I struggle just with fitting in
Plus the boys won’t give me no attention and
I get teased and made fun of by all my friends and then
See I’m feeling like I’m wishing now that I could end
My life cuz I’m sick and tired of all the time I spend
Trying to figure out how I could be worth anything
Can u help me KJ from your fan

I’m writing this letter
Cause I have to tell ya
I need some help from you
I’m writing this letter
I hope that you get it
I need some help from you

I live with my mom ever since my parents split
And At home I spend my time on the Internet
Looking at porn Im addicted and I’m sick of it
Myspace dot com is mostly where I’m getting it
On top of that there’s videos that I can watch
And I really wanna quit but its like I can’t stop
See I’m scared that I’m just gonna get caught
And when I see a girl all I think is dirty thoughts
And its not that I don’t know that it’s really wrong
But its right there for me every time I’m logging on
I got all your CD’s I really like your songs
Well I downloaded em but anyway moving on
My screen name is KJ-52 is the bomb
I want to do a website KJ rock’s dot com
I really some help cuz I can’t tell my Mom
Oh by the way my real name is ___

I’m writing this letter
Cause I have to tell ya
I need some help from you
I’m writing this letter
I hope that you get it
I need some help from you

I took the time just to write you
We play you every Wednesday at my youth group
I love your music and we all think that you’s cool
But I been struggling ever since I moved to a new school
See everybody thinks that I’m the perfect Christian girl
I had a hard time trying to believe that God is real
I’ve been on mission trips and camps the whole deal
My dad had cancer tho I prayed that God would heal
But he died anyway so it’s hard to feel
Like he cares about me so was it God’s will
To take away my dad I really got a raw deal
Sometimes I just want to swallow all my mom’s pills
When I pray I really doubt it
I’ve lost my way or maybe I’ve never found it
I been smoking and drinking nobody knows about it
By the way my name is ___ don’t mispronounce it…

If I could write to every kid that’s out there
Every kid that’s hurting feels like nobody cares
I would tell them that God can wipe away tear
And he’s right near and I would say it quite clear
Your here for a reason you’re not a mistake
You are a special creation that God himself made
To the victims of abuse to every girl that was raped
You can live you can be free from your pain
And find strength and no longer be ashamed
You can find peace and hope In Jesus name
You aint gotta live with this hurt every day
Christ came to give you life in a much better way
To every kid right now that’s full of hate
And bitterness I’d tell em just to give it all away
To the one that came to take all the blame
That’s what I’d write here’s what I’d say

One thing that I really like about KJ-52 is the fact that he’s “real”.  There are a lot of topics in today’s world, especially that teens are going through and experiencing at such a young age, that the older generation is afraid to talk about it candidly, and the teen world suffers for it.  We are forced to “discover” things on our own, because no one who’s already experienced it wants to talk about it, for fear that it “might give us ideas”?  I don’t know the exact reasons, but I know that there are some things that you just don’t talk about, but they need to be addressed.  This song is one of those candid songs that tells you what you need to hear, even if the topic can be viewed by some as too touchy to talk about.

You’re so beautiful
You’ll always be daddy’s girl
You’re so beautiful
You’ll always be daddy’s girl

Just an average girl they might’ve missed ya
You got a mom a step dad a little sister
I know his words they used to hit ya
You feel fat and ugly so your getting thinner
Sometimes you throw up or you skip dinner
Sometimes you hate the face you see in the mirror
You cry at night but nobody ever seems to hears ya
Nowhere to turn its getting no clearer
You got father in heaven though who wants to hold ya
Wrap ya in his arms lay ya head on his shoulder
Keep ya safe and warm when this world is getting colder
Tell you that you’re beautiful over and over
He sees u struggling cause he’s the one that knows ya
Sees the pain ya in plus he wants to show ya
How much you mean to him that’s why I hope ya
Take the love he gives this is what he told ya saying…

Well do you hate what your looking at
Hate looking at this person that’s looking back
Hate the way that they talk behind your back
So ashamed when ya walking to ya class
And every time now that you pass
They tease you any way they can it makes ya mad
You wanna run away from all the stress you have
Just want to fit in but it seems you never can
The other girls treat you like you’re so strange
In your life it seems like things never gone change
You just feel like a no name.
And all you wanna do is make it all go away
Skipping school sneaking out your coming home late
Far from cool so you coming up with no dates
How did your own face become what you so hate
When all along you couldn’t hear what he was gone say it was..

Do you see how much you mean now to your Father
He don’t make no junk but yet you feel you gotta
Chase so many things that this world wants to offer
You got so many needs he wants to fill yet you bother
To try to run after anything this world will give
But do you understand how beautiful you are to him
Cause then and only then that’s when you truly live
That’s when you comprehend who my Jesus is
Now to every single girl down to every kid
That struggles with your looks but now you always hid
How you felt deep inside but you always wish
To be somebody else well listen up to this
Don’t believe the junk don’t believe the lies
Cause your always beautiful now through his eyes
In your life you can find ya peace of mind
Cuz for you he died now here’s the reason why

Here’s a song that’ll really make you stop and think.  It reminds us about what exactly Jesus went through, from a human view.  I’ve noticed that, a lot of times, we see Christ’s sacrifice as something short of everything, because He was God, right?  So how could He feel pain or doubt?  This song really brings it into perspective.

 A little bit about KJ-52.  He’s a white Christian rapper from Florida.  Here’s his website, if you’re interested:  http://www.kj52.com/

 Here’s the song:  5 Minutes (In the Garden)

I got 5 minutes 5 minutes left
Five minutes till the soldiers till they bring me to my death
So very close just to breathe my last breath
As I’m here in the garden I felt the heave of my chest
My disciples are asleep and they rest
And they can’t seem to see just what be coming next
Through the trees the soldiers speed from the west
Getting closer and closer for me to arrest
I see blood drops like beads in my sweat
They run down like a crown right down on my head
I’m laid on the ground face down like I’m dead
Crying out to you Father let me pass what’s ahead
They pound the nails in my hands the hands and my legs
As the time runs outs then I hang and I bled
They are coming down I understand what you said
So with 4 minutes left this is now what I did saying..

Not my will but let your will be done

I got 3 minutes 3 minutes left
3 minutes till the soldiers bring me to my death
I can hear them loud and clear closer then I guessed
While Judas is coming down with the crowd and the rest
They don’t even understand right now what this is
They don’t know who I am what I have just to give
For ever man every girl every child every kid
See my death has been planned so many can come to live
See I know that I got just a few minutes then
Then they’ll come and they’ll grab me its the beginning of the end
See I wont make a sound see I won’t even defend
Myself to the crowd now I’ll go just with them
Cuz I came for this now I came for they sin
I came to lay my life down then I’ll take it up again
2 minutes I’ll be bound and I’ll face what’s ahead
With the words from my mouth came out then I said

I got 1 minute 1 minute left
1 minute till the soldiers gone bring me to my death
I can hear all there voices its like a 100 feet ahead
I can see all the torches now I know what is next
I’ll be beat and tortured then struck on my head
Forced to carry the cross and I’ll be lead
Up a hill to be killed then I’m left now for dead
But now it’s not my will Father I want yours now instead
And so I pray won’t you please let this cup pass from me
See I want what you want that’s all I want for me
Now I was just betrayed for some fast money
But the ones that you gave they could never snatch from me
Now my life that I gave see I gave it all away
And I’ll be buried in a grave but I’ll come back Sunday
I was born in a cave but I’ll come back one day
But the time’s now up they coming now for me

I love music.  Not so much instrumental, though I do enjoy it (I’m in band, after all).  But I love lyrics more.  I know a lot of people who, upon hearing a song for the first time, are attracted to it because of the rythym or the beat or something similar.  For me, it’s all about the lyrics.  The lyrics are the song’s essence, its purpose.  So, I’ll be posting a lot–and I do mean A LOT–of song lyrics here.  Here’s another one of my favourites:  In Christ Alone.

 In Christ alone
My hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song.
This Cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, what depths of peace,
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease.
My Comforter, my All in all.
Here in the love of Christ, I stand.

In Christ alone, who took on flesh
Fullness of God in helpless babe.
This gift of love and righteousness,
Scorned by the ones He came to save.
Til on that cross, as Jesus died,
The wrath of God was satisfied,
For every sin on Him was laid.
Here in the death of Christ I live.

There in the ground, his body lay
Light of the World by darkness slain.
Then bursting forth in glorious day,
Up from the grave He rose again.
And as He stands in victory
Sin’s curse has lost its grip on me,
For I am His, and He is mine,
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.

No guilt in life, no fear in death,
This is the power of Christ in me.
From life’s first cry, to final breath,
Jesus commands my destiny.
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Can ever pluck me from His hands,
Till He returns, or calls me home,
Here in the power of Christ, I’ll stand.
Till He returns, or calls me home,
Here in the power of Christ, I’ll stand.

Got our heels dug in,
time is draggin’ us towards
the time when time won’t
matter anymore.

They say life is but a vapor,
just a blip on the radar screen,
not the dates on your tombstone
but the dash in between.

There’s just today,
that’s all we’ve got.
There’s just today,
that’s all we’ve got.

Tick-tock,
the past is locked,
the future’s far away.
We can’t go back,
can’t hurry it up,
gotta learn to live today.

Tick-tock,
it’s now o’clock,
the little hand is ours.
The second hand sweeps us around
and the big hand has the power.
The big hand has the power.

Am I livin’, am I dyin’?
Will the world get another day?
I hear a baby cryin’
And I dig out another grave.

I’m always talkin’ ’bout a change,
but talkin’s all I’ve done.
I’m gonna start tomorrow,
but tomorrow never comes.

There’s just today,
that’s all we’ve got.
There’s just today,
that’s all we’ve got.

Tick-tock,
the past is locked,
the future’s far away.
We can’t go back,
can’t hurry it up,
gotta learn to live today.

Tick-tock,
it’s now o’clock,
the little hand is ours.
The second hand sweeps us around
and the big hand has the power.
The big hand has the power.

Always runnin’ late,
don’t procrastinate
and leave it in a hurry,
life is rollin’ on.
Gimme just a second,
wait another minute,
sleep another hour,
see another day dawn.
I’ll call ya next week,
see you in a month,
celebrate a season,
now another year’s gone.
Well there goes a decade,
a century,
millenium,
and here comes eternity,
eternity.
Here comes eternity,
eternity,
what’s up with eternity?

Tick-tock,
the past is locked,
the future’s far away.
We can’t go back,
can’t hurry it up,
gotta learn to live today.

Tick-tock,
it’s now o’clock,
the little hand is ours.
The second hand sweeps us around
and the big hand has the power.
The big hand has the power.

Tick-tock,
the past is locked,
the future’s far away.
We can’t go back,
can’t hurry it up,
gotta learn to live today.

Tick-tock,
it’s now o’clock,
the little hand is ours.
The second hand sweeps us around
and the big hand has the power.
The big hand has the power.

Just a little something to think about…

Ok, I thought I’d just tie in the theme to the Title and Tagline.  It’s fairly simple.

It’s a dark, dark world.  There’s war, poverty, disease, and death all around us, happening every day, whether we see it or not, or whether we admit it or not.  Yet, there are those who fight the darkness, with the Light of the World…I think you can see where this is going.  The verses describe the tagline, which describes how we have the Light of the World.

The End.

Ok, so first of all, kudos to my awesomely amazing, tech-savvy boyfriend for helping me set this up.  This is really cool.

Secondly, I want to say hello to everyone.  This is my first time ever doing something like this, and I honestly have just about no idea what I’m doing, so yeah…bear with me :)  I’m a quick learner (generally), so I should be up and moving pretty quick, but until then, things might be a little slow around here…

At this point, just look around, enjoy my AWESOME theme, and have fun (and, if you want, feel free to leave any comments giving me tips or whatever).